I Up My Boyfriend Game With The Help Of My F̶a̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ Bother Figures [closed post]

[summerdude]

Magnus shows up to the kitchen earlier than the agreed-upon time, since he's actually really excited to fold tamales (and learn how to prep the individual components thereof) with a couple of his favorite people. When he gets there, he remembers having to teach Galahad about hand-washing, and thinks about the fact that both Sagramore and Lan Wangji are from old-timey places. When they arrive, they'll find him scrubbing down the countertops, making sure they have a clean workspace.

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[summerdude]

Magnus stops in the middle of saying, "Hey, did you hear about Constantinople--" and looks at Lan Wangji. "Yeah, I think that's a good idea! Maybe one of each, before we get too far ahead of ourselves?"

[sagramore]

"I've heard a fair amount about Constantinople," he remarks, before glancing over.

[lightbearinglord]

Lan Wangji nods, so as to prevent himself from interrupting them any further. Presumably, with a moment of searching, the kitchen cabinets will see fit to provide a tamale steamer. He sets to work on getting some water boiling in the bottom.

[summerdude]

"You know they changed its name?"

[sagramore]

"Aziraphale told me that. Istanbul now?"

[summerdude]

"There's a whole song and everything," Magnus says, and gives Sagramore a shit-eating grin before singing the first two lines. His voice is... fine. Decent. Not great, but not terrible. Mostly on-key? Then he wrinkles his nose. "Jack knows all the words."

[sagramore]

"I think I need to hear it from Jack. I still don't understand why they changed it, Aziraphale told me also that Istanbul isn't anyone's name."

[lightbearinglord]

With the steamer in place and the burner on, Lan Wangji has little to do but listen to Magnus and Sagramore. Luckily, this is a pleasant occupation. It will remain pleasant as long as Jack does not make an appearance and begin singing.

[summerdude]

"Constantinople was someone's name?"

[sagramore]

"Constantine the Great, if I remember correctly."

[lightbearinglord]

A little surprised at himself about it, Lan Wangji actually has something to say. "The Roman Empire?"

[sagramore]

"He was Roman emperor when it was named for him. By the time I lived there the empire was called Byzantium."

[summerdude]

Magnus sighs. "I gotta add 'more history' to my list of things to learn," he says.

[lightbearinglord]

Lan Wangji is not leaning against the counter, because he does not lean unless he is drunk or coming home to Wei Ying after a very long day, but he has tucked himself up beside it to keep an eye on the steamer. "It is easy to lose oneself in the library here. I intended to research the meaning of Claudius' name; that is what led me to the history of Rome. Young master Grantaire spoke of the classical mythology of his world, too. I could have spent days reading those volumes alone."

[sagramore]

"Christ, he's a wonder, isn't he?" in a voice that's rich with both fondness and admiration. "I was supposed to learn all those things when I was a boy but I hated them so I never really put any effort in. He must love it all. He has a thousand and one references at his fingertips at any given moment."

[summerdude]

"They're real too, you know," Magnus says, tying off another tamale. "Those gods. I haven't met them, but my cousin's mom is Athena, and I visited her -- Annabeth, my cousin -- once in New Rome." He sighs. "She had to get special permission to live there, 'cause her mom is in her Greek aspect, not her Roman one. Honestly, it all seems really complicated. I was," he admits -- because he's comfortable specifically admitting this one thing with these two specific men, "a little jealous that the whole point of being a Roman demigod seems to be living long enough to get to grow up and get old in a little Roman demigod town."

[lightbearinglord]

Lan Wangji frowns faintly, looking at Magnus. "That is a kinder fate than the one that met you." He is still generally displeased with the basic concept of Valhalla and the amount of violence it foisted upon Magnus.

[sagramore]

"I'm rather inclined to agree. I'd be jealous too."

[summerdude]

"Oh, they have to survive to adulthood first, I guess," Magnus says. "Which I guess is hard. But..." He scuffs his toe on the floor and pulls a face. "Yeah."

[lightbearinglord]

"It is a cruelly pointless distinction," Lan Wangji says, with distaste for this entire system.

[sagramore]

"I agree with that too. So the gods have children and then devise a series of cosmologically consistent afterlives to subject them to, in the guise of a choice where both choices are bad. Who in hell wants that for their children?"

[summerdude]

"Annabeth said there was this whole thing with the Greeks where they wouldn't even, like, claim their kids, because they were like, 'ooooh, it feels bad when they die!' but also the Big Three made a literal pact to stop fucking around and literally all of them failed," Magnus says. "Or, well. I guess Hades was a grey area. But, um, I'm pretty sure I'm from the only afterlife with a meaningful afterlife where you, like, do stuff."

[lightbearinglord]

With some care, Lan Wangji says, "You should never have died at all. But I am grateful that Valhalla allowed us to meet."

[sagramore]

Sagramore catches Lan Wangji's eye and nods. "What he said, exactly."

[summerdude]

"Uh," says Magnus. "Um. Hang on a second, I gotta -- get something real quick." And he nips into the pantry to have a private little emotion.