New Plan, Step One: Provide For My Community [open]

[summerdude]

Magnus needs something to change, so when a Mansion calendar helpfully informs him that it's International Falafel Day back on Earth, he goes to the library for some cookbooks, and then to the kitchen.

He lays out ten different falafel recipes. He gathers the ingredients they list, as best as he can understand them. He has canned chickpeas and fresh chickpeas and dried chickpeas and chickpea flour and box mixes of falafel that say 'just add water!'

Cripes.

"I can do this," he says, peering at the assorted recipes intently for a good ten minutes, and then takes the dried chickpeas over to the sink to rinse and soak.

Comments

[lightbearinglord]

"With Shen Yuan's body?" Lan Wangji prompts. There must be more, but he hopes this will invite Magnus to explain at more length. He squeezes Magnus' shoulder.

[summerdude]

"With, like, everything."

[lightbearinglord]

"Tell me," Lan Wangji says, and it's gentle, inasmuch as he can sound gentle when he is this weary, but it is a command.

[summerdude]

"There's just -- so much to take care of," Magnus says. "Like, obviously I'm fine with a lot of responsibility, but it's a lot."

[lightbearinglord]

"Claudius will help you with Shen Yuan's body," Lan Wangji says again. "Tell me what else is burdening you."

[summerdude]

Magnus shrugs. "It's just, like, everything?" he says. "There's so much to do every day, and it was, like, fine at first, because being busy felt good, but even my longest quests back home didn't last more than a week or two, tops."

[lightbearinglord]

Everything and so much, while evocative, do very little to illuminate to Lan Wangji what it is that has Magnus so bothered. He shifts a little again, so that he is facing Magnus, keeping a hand at his shoulder. He makes eye contact. "What is there to do? What is this quest you are on?" And, for the third time, he tries a direct order: "Tell me."

[summerdude]

"Fixing Shen Yuan?" Magnus says, and sighs. "I'm sorry, Hanguang-jun. I don't even know if I can pinpoint it. It's just, like, everything is hard right now, you know? I think everything is just, like, really overwhelming — except Sunny," he corrects immediately. "Sunny is the best. And stuff with Alex is fine," except for that one little thing he hasn't told her about yet. "But everything else? Like, I'm so scared I'm going to do something wrong and y— people aren't going to be happy with me, or proud of me or whatever, and I really miss Galahad, and like, it was nice that he and Claudius and me and Alex over for dinner but it just wasn't the same, and I do really like spending time with Claudius when Galahad is training with you but I don't even know what threats to look for, so how can I be prepared if they come? And then this asshole who sucks shows up here, like, if someone from the Greek side of my world showed up here, why couldn't it have been, like, my cousin? Or her boyfriend? Not the god who was a total dick to them. And we're both missing memories that are probably important, and one of my best friends is dead and it feels like it's all on me to get him back, and I just... I don't know! It's everything! It's a lot!"

[lightbearinglord]

In a manner that is notably reminiscent of someone else in Magnus' life with a serious demeanor and a flat affect, Lan Wangji listens, and then he is quiet as he absorbs what Magnus has said. He rubs his thumb against Magnus' shoulder, deliberate the way every gesture he makes or touch he initiates is deliberate. He thinks of the day that Magnus confronted him outside, and how it seemed to help when he addressed every point, one by one, to the best of his abilities. He will try to do that now, although he is tired and he has already spilled what feels like too many words in the service of translating for Shen Yuan. For Magnus, he always wants to try.

"Sunny is the best," he says, in grave agreement. "It is impossible to do nothing wrong. I will be proud of you regardless. I did not intend to keep Galahad from you with our training. It is also impossible to prepare for every threat. I told you that I would fight for you. I can't protect you against every threat, but that is still true." Another, shorter, pause, as he considers everything that is left. "I suspected you would be unhappy that Apollo is here. It is not all on you to get Shen Yuan back. That plant has grown without you before, in Bai Lu Forest where Shen Yuan harvested its seeds. It could do so again."

He squeezes Magnus' shoulder again, gathering some resolve. "It is a lot. I know."

[summerdude]

"Hanguang-jun," Magnus says, and pauses. "I don't need you to, like, fix it. For what it's worth. I'm just... sharing."

[lightbearinglord]

"I want to fix everything," Lan Wangji admits. For everyone, but especially for Magnus, who deserves to rest. "I can't. Neither can you."

[summerdude]

Magnus half-snorts. "Sounds fake, but okay," he says, curling up at Lan Wangji's side.

[lightbearinglord]

Lan Wangji releases a breath and looks down at Magnus. From this angle, the dark smudges beneath his eyes are all the more visible. He arranges his arm firmly around Magnus. "Tell Galahad you miss him," he adds, a final command for now. And then he drops another decisive kiss to the top of Magnus' head.

[summerdude]

"Yes sir, Hanguang-jun, sir," Magnus says, warmed. He sighs deeply, and wills himself to relax another few degrees. "Thank you."

[lightbearinglord]

The feeling of Magnus' body losing a modicum of its tension coaxes some almost undetectable relaxation from Lan Wangji in turn. He can only imagine how the path ahead might wind as they try to find and corner Aornis. There are hours left before they can take that falafel from the refrigerator again. Perhaps it will serve them both well to spend that time peacefully together.

[summerdude]

"Hanguang-jun?"

[lightbearinglord]

"Mn?"

[summerdude]

"It'll get easier soon, right?"

[lightbearinglord]

Lan Wangji doesn't answer immediately. There are too many things yet unknown. Aornis' location, her likelihood of killing again, how far her powers truly extend. But they have come astonishingly far from where they began on the day of Shen Yuan's death. Claudius has everything in writing, and Lan Wangji trusts him without reservation. He will help Magnus with the plant body; Lan Wangji will place the spirit in that body. And time smooths over most edges, in its inexorable way. "Yes." He gives Magnus' arm a squeeze.

[summerdude]

Magnus nods, relaxing another few degrees. "I'm sorry."

[lightbearinglord]

"Why?" He is puzzled enough by the apology that it is a genuine question.

[summerdude]

"You've been overwhelmed and I've been, like. Moody, or whatever."

[lightbearinglord]

"You have been overwhelmed, too." And it is not Magnus' job to look after Lan Wangji's mood or workload.

[summerdude]

"Still," he says, insistent.

[lightbearinglord]

Lan Wangji can be just as stubborn. "You are not responsible for me."