What's In An Unknowable Birthday? I Guess We'll Find Out!

[summerdude]

Magnus is a man on a mission. Actually, he's a man on several missions, but now that he's successfully pulled off the bachelorette part of Galahad's wedding, this one stands out as of particular import. As such, he has a pad of construction paper chock-full of notes tucked in his backpack and he's swinging briefly into every room he passes, on the lookout for Grantaire.

Comments

[futaille]

"Why thank you," he says brightly.

[summerdude]

"So your reputation here is super different," Magnus says. "Does that bother you?"

[futaille]

"It's... kind of strange, honestly. Not in an awful way, but... Actually, since you clearly can look at a different angle than I can, what would you say my reputation here is?"

[summerdude]

"Helpful. Fun." Magnus runs through everything he knows about Grantaire which, because he's Galahad's best friend, is a good amount, but because he's not given to the rigorous analytical social assessment other residents embrace, is also not very much. "Boyfriends Georg?"

[futaille]

He can't help but look amused. "Boyfriends Georg?"

[summerdude]

"It's a reference. To Spiders Georg. It's a meme." He quotes, "'Average person eats three spiders a year' factoid is just a statistical error. Average person eats zero spiders a year. Spiders Georg, who lives in a cave and eats over ten thousand each day, is an outlier and should not have been counted.' So I'm saying, like, Boyfriends Grantaire Lastname, who lives in a weird mansion and has ten thousand boyfriends, is an outlier----"

[futaille]

He laughs. "I like it. Even if it's a bit hyperbolic. Oh, and Grantaire is my last name."

[summerdude]

"Huh," says Magnus, thoughtfully. "Okay, Spiders. Good to know."

[futaille]

"That will work. Or wouldn't it be Boyfriends? It's Étienne, though, to be technically accurate."

[summerdude]

"Étienne?" Magnus says, and then his eyes grow wider. "Uncle D's mystery Étienne????"

[futaille]

"Oh, am I a mystery now?"

[summerdude]

"I just thought Étienne was some guy he knew back home," Magnus admits. "What does it mean?"

[futaille]

"Crown or wreath. Same root as the name Stephen?"

[summerdude]

"Your name," says Magnus, with mounting delight, "is Steve?????"

[futaille]

He laughs. "I suppose?"

[summerdude]

"Whoa...." It's safe to say Magnus's mind is blown. "You definitely don't have Steve vibes."

[futaille]

"How would you define Steve vibes?"

[summerdude]

"Like..." Magnus considers the question seriously. "Steve-y?"

[futaille]

"I am trying to envision what Steve-y would entail. Since it wouldn't be like me, I hypothesize... somber? No tolerance for foolishness?"

[summerdude]

"No, that's not it at all. The Steves of the world are like the Eriks of Valhalla, I think." This would make perfect sense to Alex!

[futaille]

"Oh, like the Eriks, of course."

[summerdude]

"They're everywhere, and you can usually tell when you're looking at one even though they're almost nothing alike," Magnus nods.

[futaille]

"They just have an Erikesque manner?"

[summerdude]

"It's a vibe. And Steves have a Stevesque one."

[futaille]

"But I don't have a Stevesque vibe?"