I Lose All Sense Of Reason [open post]

[summerdude]

Magnus is walking down the front steps of the Mansion, freshly-loaded bag of food in tow, ruminating on a few of his most recent and devastatingly embarrassing conversations, when he hears footsteps behind him.

Well. He did tell Galahad he'd ask everyone. Might as well start now. "Can you explain the birds and the bees -- I mean, sex -- to me?" he demands, even before he sees who it is.

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[sorrowandsorrow]

Janet thinks about this with an affected air of contemplation. "I guess this is a new challenge for the fucked up magic fridges here. IKEA meatballs."

[summerdude]

"Making up for Valhalla's shortcomings by introducing them to everyone here?" Magnus asks. He actually has never had IKEA meatballs before, but that doesn't seem worth mentioning.

[sorrowandsorrow]

"Absolutely." Janet laughs under her breath. "I made Tress try Poptarts once. She's so polite, she didn't even make it obvious how much she hated them."

[summerdude]

"Hate Poptarts?" Magnus is horrified, actually. "What kind did you give her?"

[sorrowandsorrow]

"Strawberry," Janet says indignantly, like she's offended by the idea of giving Tress anything else. "Duh. She didn't like the Froot Loops, either."

[summerdude]

"That's so weird," Magnus breathes. "Like, all respect and everything. But whoa."

[sorrowandsorrow]

Janet laughs a little under her breath. "I think her world doesn't really have those flavors. The only thing she liked was the everything bagel."

[summerdude]

"Those are pretty good," Magnus allows. "I've been on a one-man quest to introduce as many people as possible to falafel and root beer. And chocolate. What else would you throw into a Good Food Crash Course?"

[sorrowandsorrow]

"Chocolate! Christ. I didn't even think about all the people here who wouldn't have had chocolate." Janet thinks for a second. "I'm more of a booze girl, but Italian food, right?"

[summerdude]

"Oh, gods yeah," says Magnus. "Italian. A classic. And Mexican?"

[sorrowandsorrow]

"Please," Janet says with feeling. "Goes without saying. I'm from Southern California. Shit, I could go for a margarita, actually."

[summerdude]

"I've never had a margarita," Magnus says, thoughtfully. "Are they any good?"

[sorrowandsorrow]

Right. Because he's been sixteen for multiple years. "Delicious," Janet says, "if you like tequila."

[summerdude]

Magnus shrugs. "I like mead," he says. "As long as it doesn't get weird. And I don't like vodka. That's all I know."

[sorrowandsorrow]

"Vodka is the most boring liquor there is," Janet informs her, "so you're on the right track. Does it count as serving alcohol to a minor if I make you a margarita?"

[summerdude]

"Yes," Magnus tells her, very somberly. "I'm a minor. My twenty-fifth birthday is next week and they ply us with mead every day in Valhalla. But that's, like, just details. You'd be a very bad person if you made me a margarita."

[sorrowandsorrow]

All right, okay, that makes Janet laugh. "You're almost twenty-five and you've never had a margarita? I'd be a very bad person if I didn't make you one."

[summerdude]

Magnus laughs, too. "If you say so!" he says. Alcohol doesn't actually interest him that much, but he's curious enough to give it a shot.

[sorrowandsorrow]

"Do you want your margarita right now, almost-birthday boy? Or would you rather stand here and interrogate more people about sex?"

[summerdude]

Magnus blushes. "I'm definitely done with asking people about sex," he says.

[sorrowandsorrow]

"Come on." She jerks her thumb over her shoulder back toward the inside of the mansion. "Unless that stuff you've got needs to go somewhere."

[summerdude]

"Nah, none of it is going to go bad anytime soon," Magnus says, shouldering his bag. "Lead the way."

[sorrowandsorrow]

Usually, when Janet enters mixology mode, she goes for one of the bars or lounges or something, but she's pretty positive Magnus is going to be a blended margarita sort of guy, so she heads for the kitchen. There's a liquor cabinet around the corner from it that she immediately raids for tequila and triple sec before she pops back into the kitchen and hauls a blender out of a cupboard. "You like salt?"

[summerdude]

"Sure," Magnus says. "You put salt in those things?"

[sorrowandsorrow]

"You put salt on those things." Feeling irritated gratitude for this stupid mansion and its endless¹ store of magic, Janet rustles up a few long-stemmed margarita glasses -- for the vibe -- and then a lime, which she slices in two and runs around the rim of each glass. A little kosher salt in a bowl and bam, she's got salt-rimmed glasses.

¹Gentle lever tap.