You Say Overkill, I Say Due Diligence [open post]

[summerdude]

Magnus copies the sign onto seven different pieces of paper. It reads:

WANT TO LEARN NEW SKILLS? ME FREAKING TOO. I (Magnus Chase) Will Trade Lessons In Any Of The Following For Something You Know:

• ASL (Alf/American Sign Language)


• Camping (pitching tents, campfire safety, celestial navigation)


• What To Do If You Find Yourself Lost In The World Tree Yggdrasil


• Pickpocketing (But only if you promise to use it for good (stealing ONLY from dickhead rich people) and ONLY if you have to!)


• Swordfighting for Beginners (I am intermediate but Jack is advanced and he can help!)


• What It REALLY Feels Like To Die (NOT ADVICE!!!)


• (Trans)Gender Identity and Fluidity (from the perspective of a cis guy) (Alex-approved content only)


• What To Do If The God You're Talking To Is Super Obnoxious Particular


• Why Falafel is the Best Food in the World

All skills welcome! But if you know any of the following I am especially interested: Cooking, Geometry, How To Declare Your Love To Your Partner, Hand-to-Hand Combat, Balancing a Budget, Writing Poetry, Social Studies, Codebreaking.

(Sorry but I will not learn pottery from anyone but ♥Alex Fierro♥. I hope you understand.)

PS if there's enough interest we can maybe do full classes where everybody gets to take turns teaching and learning?

He adds a note about the areas where he can most frequently be found and then posts one sign in each of the two kitchens he's encountered, one by the welcome table, one on the door to the greenhouses, one in the library, one on his bedroom door, and one by what he believes to be the most-populated lounge. Then, with a great deal of eager anticipation, he goes about his day.


[A note from Magnus's typist: Open indefinitely!]

Comments

[futaille]

He nods slowly. "Yes, that makes sense." He takes a long, thoughtful drink from his bottle. "So what if you're not sure what it is you want out of the situation? Just try to avoid the god and situation in question at all costs?"

[summerdude]

"Oh, that's not a good idea," Magnus says, setting his half-finished wrap down and taking another sip of mead. "You can't avoid gods. If you don't have a specific objective in mind, then I recommend picking a go-to objective to tide you over. Like 'figuring out what their secret passion is' or 'sucking up to them to curry favor for the future' or possibly 'offering your services on a quest' or something. But god are unavoidable. That's why my lesson is about learning their particularities rather than nopeing out of the exchange."

[futaille]

"You know, I think I'm glad I have not had the acquaintance of nearly as many gods as you have."

[summerdude]

"Have you met one, though?" Magnus asks. "To be interested in this particular topic?"

[futaille]

"I... well, no, not really. It's mostly curiosity, I guess. In case I ever do get introduced to one, it could come in handy. And who knows, it's also possible that knowing how to deal with gods could apply in... non-god situations, too."

[summerdude]

"So the thing about gods is that they're like people, right," Magnus agrees. "But with a lot more power and a lot more pettiness. Personally? I wouldn't try to manage people the same way I would a god. Seems insulting." He means insulting to the person, who have much more flexibility than gods.

[futaille]

"Gods. Like people, but worse. That makes entirely too much sense."

[summerdude]

"Yeah, they're just like -- more." Magnus smiles. "My friend Sam, she's really devout and she's the one who pointed this out to me when she was explaining how she can believe there is only one true god while also having a totally different god from a totally different pantheon as a parent."

[futaille]

"Because a true god wouldn't be as petty?" Grantaire guesses.

[summerdude]

Magnus shrugs. "Probably. You'd have to ask her. Her explanation is really good, but I'm still an atheist. Um, maybe for similar reasons."

[futaille]

"Well, if she gets here, then, I'll ask her. Might be interesting."

[summerdude]

"Oh yeah, everything Sam says is interesting," Magnus enthuses. "She's the smartest person I know."

[futaille]

"Well, you're clearly pretty smart yourself if you have such a long list of things to teach people."

[summerdude]

Magnus squints at Grantaire for a moment, trying to decide if he's teasing. On the one hand, Magnus's mother was always adamant that he was the brightest in the family, even more than Randolph -- though, of course, she didn't know Annabeth, whose mother is literally the Greek goddess of wisdom. You could get in to Harvard one day, she'd used to say, and it made him brave enough to face the overwhelmingly crowded halls of school.

On the other... "Yeah, maybe," he says. "I'm really only offering experiential stuff. I dropped out of high school when I became homeless. Sam is academically smart, too." He smiles, a little reflexively. "I'm offering up the trades because I miss learning and now I have time to do it."

[futaille]

"You're more diligent than I am. I avoided school as much as possible in favor of experiences. Games, frivolities, where to find the best of anything in Paris. I'm very well-schooled in what I sought out, but I'll cheerfully admit that for an art student, my paintings are positively miserable."

[summerdude]

"Yeah, that sounds like a choice you made, though," Magnus says with a bit of a self-effacing grin. "I haven't been able to choose like that since I was fourteen, and that was, like..." He still doesn't know what year it is. "Four to twelve years ago, probably."

[futaille]

"Well, that's a range. And at least you're making your choices now."

[summerdude]

"Welcome to death," Magnus jokes. "Time sure starts to blur pretty quickly!"

[futaille]

"Let the time blur all it wants. I wasn't really expecting anything on the other side."

[summerdude]

"Neither was I," Magnus says. "Turns out death is pretty lit, though."

[futaille]

"I'm mostly enjoying it so far, so I'll defer to your expertise." He frowns thoughtfully. "Oh, but you wanted to trade knowledge, right?"

[summerdude]

"Oh! Right," Magnus says. He leans forward eagerly. He'd gotten caught up in the conversation and nearly forgotten.

[futaille]

"I'm just not sure what I could teach you back. I can box, but I'm not sure it's quite enough to be considered 'hand-to-hand combat', and the rest of your list doesn't exactly cover my areas of expertise."

[summerdude]

"Oh, it doesn't have to be something on the list," Magnus says, quickly. "That was just a starting list of ideas. What are your areas of expertise?"

[futaille]

"The best spots to go in Paris, although that's not useful here. Billiards, dominoes... I'm all right at tennis, dancing... Oh! And being an annoyance but not so much of an annoyance that your friends won't let you be near them ever again."