I Up My Boyfriend Game With The Help Of My F̶a̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ Bother Figures [closed post]

[summerdude]

Magnus shows up to the kitchen earlier than the agreed-upon time, since he's actually really excited to fold tamales (and learn how to prep the individual components thereof) with a couple of his favorite people. When he gets there, he remembers having to teach Galahad about hand-washing, and thinks about the fact that both Sagramore and Lan Wangji are from old-timey places. When they arrive, they'll find him scrubbing down the countertops, making sure they have a clean workspace.

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[summerdude]

"Awesome." Magnus glances between both guys, and smiles to himself. He's kind of bummed Laertes couldn't make it, but he's pretty sure he's in for an awesome afternoon. "I've read a lot of recipes but trying to envision the steps is still, like, all Greek to me," he says, and then wrinkles his nose. Annabeth has taught him at least ten words in ancient Greek. "All... Hindi to me."

[lightbearinglord]

Lan Wangji tosses a quick, fond glance toward Magnus. "I learned to cook more than Cloud Recesses food for Wei Ying. I began by observing the cooks at his favorite restaurant and asking them several questions." By this he means that hands-on experience will likely do Magnus wonders. Out of the fridge, he retrieves a reasonable quantity of pork shoulder, which he sets on the counter as he goes in search of a cleaver.

[sagramore]

"If you want me to be useful, just let me know what part you want me to do. Laertes likes a mise en place." He's hoping the mansion will translate that, actually.

[summerdude]

"Yeah, Hanguang-jun, put us to work!"

[lightbearinglord]

Let's just imagine that the mansion does something to translate the meaning of the phrase, at least. Lan Wangji nods and surveys his helpers. "We will need a head of garlic, an onion, bay leaves, and several spices. Cumin, salt, pepper, and paprika. Once the meat is cooking, we will begin work on the sauce."

[sagramore]

"At your word, my lord," with one of his playful bows; then he's off to raid the spice cabinet.

[summerdude]

And so Magnus goes to retrieve the onion and garlic, which he deposits on the countertop.

[lightbearinglord]

"The onion must be cut into large pieces and the garlic peeled." Presuming that they will divide the tasks as they see fit, Lan Wangji, who has found a cleaver and a cutting board, starts to tidily chop the pork shoulder into its own large pieces.

[sagramore]

"Garlic or onion?" to Magnus.

[summerdude]

Magnus's knife skills are still pretty limited to murdering people with them. He wants to improve them, but for now -- "I'll take the garlic," he says, starting to separate out the cloves.

[lightbearinglord]

With two considerably more talkative people around, Lan Wangji lapses into peaceful silence. He finds a large pot, scrapes the pieces of pork into it, pours in a couple of cups of water, and begins measuring out the various spices fetched by Sagramore. He does, however, pause to watch Magnus for a moment, then takes one of garlic cloves and his knife and demonstrates to him how to brace the blade against a clove and give it a single blow with the heel of his palm to peel it easily.

[sagramore]

Sagramore is pretty good at mincing things, he does it for Laertes all the time. He raises his eyebrows at the garlic smash, making internal notes.

[summerdude]

"That's cool," says Magnus, and smashes a clove between his fingertips. "Wait, do you want these to be, like, fully intact?"

[lightbearinglord]

"I did," Lan Wangji says, "but this will be fine." If this recipe is so precise that one crushed garlic clove will spoil it, he stands very little chance at making it correctly anyway. As Magnus and Sagramore finish their tasks, he goes to assemble ingredients for the sauce, beginning with plucking two bags from the cabinets, one containing guajillo chiles and the other full of ancho chiles. It also calls for another onion, so he passes that wordlessly to Sagramore.

[sagramore]

He tosses it in the air and catches it, for the sheer pleasure of being silly, before he makes a cut and begins peeling off the crackly brown outer skin. "So these are things you've tried before, Nuszka?"

[summerdude]

Magnus peels the next cloves more sedately. He looks up at Sagramore's question. "Me?"

[lightbearinglord]

Sagramore is very obviously not addressing Lan Wangji. He gives Magnus one invisibly amused look about it, then scoops up Magnus' garlic along with Sagramore's first chopped onion and adds all of that to his pot. Self-indulgent and barely even sorry about it, he does, of course, light the burner with a little two-fingered flick of controlled qi.

[sagramore]

"I honestly have no idea how I'd begin to make Lan Wangji's name smaller, so it has to be you."

[summerdude]

Magnus considers this. "I guess Hanguang-jun is an embiggening, not an ensmallening," he says, thoughtfully. "And yeah! I love tamales. Alex grew up with them."

[lightbearinglord]

Theoretically, Lan Wangji could propose one or two possible diminutives for his own name, but he doesn't care to hear any of them from anyone but his husband. When he was very small, his mother and, occasionally, his brother called him A-Zhan, but that was so long ago it hardly feels real. "My birth name is Lan Zhan," he offers. After a beat, he adds, "Do not call me that."

[sagramore]

"No fear," with his usual airy hand gesture, only this time he has a knife.

[summerdude]

"Can I say it once to make sure I'm pronouncing it right?"

[lightbearinglord]

"Mn," Lan Wangji agrees, because there is very little within reason that he would actually deny Magnus. He starts removing the stems and seeds from his assortment of chiles.

[sagramore]

Sagramore listens, as he returns to dicing the onion very small.

[summerdude]

Oh, well now Magnus is self-conscious about it! He pauses in peeling garlic and says, "Lan Zhan?" a little uncertainly, but clearly trying very hard to get the tones right.