If Alex Came Back We'd DEFINITELY Be The Local Power Couple [open post]

[summerdude]

Magnus has come to realize that nobody else in this entire place is presently in a relationship that has lasted nearly as long as his and Alex's. Shen Yuan's concept of "communication" "with" "Luo Binghe" is continuing to horrify him every time he thinks about it. What if there are other people who could use the advice of a sixteen-year-old twenty-five-year-old virgin who has been in a committed relationship for nearly seven years with someone to who he is probably widely known to have never verbally declared the undying depths of his love? (Gods, he hopes Alex figures out a way to do another little visit for their rapidly-approaching anniversary)

To that end, he posts an announcement sign over the welcome table, in the café, and on the door to the kitchen. It reads:

NEED RELATIONSHIP ADVICE OR FEEDBACK? Local Long-Term Relationship Expert Magnus Chase Offers His Aid.

He even lists office hours — an inoffensive parlor (meaning he can tolerate hanging out in it, and the door can close if people want privacy for their conversations) every other day for an hour, immediately following his Drosera hand-off to Galahad.

Comments

[tallyyoungblood]

Since the day she'd spent with an ugly mind, Tally's been thinking a lot about how bubbly-making Aziraphale was for Crowley, and how bubbly-making Zane had been for her. Kissing, undoubtedly, is totally bubbly-making.

Now that she's learned that Gideon isn't dating Nina, or anybody, Tally's been having a hard time putting aside the idea of maybe, just maybe, kissing Gideon. Gideon likes girls (a LOT), she's Tally's friend, and Tally trusts her more than almost anyone else here. It's not like Tally really likes her, or anything. She's an ugly. But maybe she'd be okay with providing something better than caffeine for staying bubbly? It makes Tally totally bubbly to think about, even though it's also utterly embarrassing.

Tally plans to ask Georgia for advice, of course, but when she passes Magnus's sign, she stops and thinks it over. It can't hurt to get a second opinion, can it? Plus, maybe Magnus will feel happy that Tally wants his advice, and start liking her more. Tally had always felt so belonging when Shay asked her for fashion advice.

She goes to the room at the appointed hour, after she's thanked Gideon for her daily coffee delivery and shooed her away much faster than usual.

"Um, hi, Magnus-l--Magnus," she amends, remembering that Lan Wangji hadn't liked her jumping to -wa too quickly. "I saw your sign."

[summerdude]

"Oh, hey Tally." Magnus still doesn't really know what to make of her, but now that he knows a little more about what her whole deal is, he guesses she has her reasons. He can't help but be a little excited at the prospect of someone coming to him for actual advice. "What's up?"

[tallyyoungblood]

"Do you know much about... um... lesbians?" Tally says tentatively.

[summerdude]

"Um," says Magnus. This -- wasn't really the sort of question he expected! "Like, as much as any cis^* guy^** can, I guess? I mean, I have lesbian friends. Why?"


^*?
^**??

[tallyyoungblood]

"Well, where I come from no one really picks a gender like that," Tally explains. "So... like... I don't know what the rules are. Do you also have to be a lesbian to, um, kiss one? Or be butch if she's butch? I think the butch thing is totally bubbly, but I'm not sure if it's what I want to do?" Tally feels like this is her first day in New Pretty Town, trying to learn which clique is which.

[summerdude]

"Wait." Magnus sits up a little straighter. "You're nonbinary?"

[tallyyoungblood]

"I mean, picks a gender to pursue, like, romantically. Is that what it's called when you like both?" The term is familiar, but somehow doesn't seem quite right.

[summerdude]

Oh. "Oh. No, that's bisexual. Nonbinary is when you're neither male nor female."

[tallyyoungblood]

"Bisexual! Yes. That's me. Nonbinary sounds bubbly, but how do you ever know what to wear?" Tally asks. "It's hard enough to pick between pants and a dress when you're a girl. At least with butch it mostly just seems like boy's fashion on a girl. The number of choices you could get from mixing and matching sounds dizzy-making."

[summerdude]

"Clothes don't have... gender," says Magnus, who regularly wears the dress that reminds him of Alex and who has seen Sagramore rockin' a gown. Also Alex wears the same clothes regardless of gender, so. "Like, anyone can wear anything and it's fine."

[tallyyoungblood]

"Not anything, not if the bash has a dress code," Tally says. "Like, what if you showed up in formal at a casual party? But I get your point. A boy could totally wear a ballgown to a ball. But we're getting utterly off track."

[summerdude]

Magnus has never had that problem. The sorts of parties he gets invited to, you end up wearing either blood or chocolate. But Tally is right, he's gotten side-tracked. "Lesbians can and do date bisexuals," he says.

[tallyyoungblood]

"Really?" Tally feels like there's a hot air balloon in her chest. "Okay, bubbly. Thank you. I'm totally not used to Rusty gender and sexuality stuff."

[summerdude]

Magnus squints at Tally. "...what else do you want to know?"

[tallyyoungblood]

Tally fiddles with her hands nervously. "I mean, I guess I was just thinking about asking one of my friends if she wants to kiss me, and you said you were a relationship expert... any advice on how to bring it up?"

[summerdude]

Magnus is pretty sure Qi Yan doesn't self-identify as butch, even though he's kind of mentally categorized her in that way. He also gets the sense that she's not really looking. "Um, can I have more context?"

[tallyyoungblood]

"It's Gideon. You know, from the hand-chopping plan...?" Tally looks at him expectantly. "Um, I mean, which is probably not a go. But yeah. Also don't tell her, please."

[summerdude]

Oh, right. Gideon! "Obviously I'm not going to tell her that you have a crush on her, that's your business."

[tallyyoungblood]

"It's not entirely, like, a crush," Tally says. "I just want to kiss her." Obviously, those things are different. "It's much easier where I'm from, because everyone acts the same way. Here... I don't know."

[summerdude]

"Why do you want to kiss her if it's not a crush?"

[tallyyoungblood]

Ugh, this is so embarrassing, but Tally does nothing if not commit.

"It's to stay bubbly," she says. "I need to get my heart rate up to think straight, and kissing definitely helps that."

[summerdude]

"Oh, like the cold thing," Magnus nods. "But does kissing someone you're not interested in get your heart rate up?" He can't imagine it would have the same effect.

[tallyyoungblood]

"I'm impressed you remember the cold thing," Tally says. "I don't know... it's a risky activity. Maybe I shouldn't mess with our relationship like that?"

[summerdude]

Magnus is trying so, so hard to understand, but he's still extremely confused. "Why would kissing someone you don't even have feelings for be a risky activity? Is this butch lesbian trying to kill you?"

[tallyyoungblood]

"No, because it might ruin the friendship!" Tally exclaims.